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최근 수정 시각 : 2023-08-26 00:23:29

존 코자트

Paint에서 넘어옴
<colbgcolor=#708090><colcolor=#fff> 존 코자트
Jon Cozart
파일:external/s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/c6b7fc4c1aca3a170896eba79a921119.jpg
이름 조나단 찰스 코자트
Jonathan Charles Cozart
출생 1992년 4월 26일 ([age(1992-04-26)]세)
미국 아칸소주 리틀록
국적
[[미국|]][[틀:국기|]][[틀:국기|]]
신체 170cm
학력 텍사스 대학교[1] 영화학
링크 파일:유튜브 아이콘.svg 파일:iTunes 아이콘.svg 파일:인스타그램 아이콘.svg 파일:페이스북 아이콘.svg 파일:X Corp 아이콘(블랙).svg 파일:구글 플러스 아이콘.svg

1. 개요2. 시리즈 목록
2.1. (영화) in 99 Seconds2.2. After Ever After
2.2.1. DISNEY Parody 12.2.2. DISNEY Parody 22.2.3. DISNEY Parody 3
3. 여담

1. 개요

Paint라는 이름의 유튜브 채널을 운영하는 유튜버이다.

영화 시리즈 99초 요약이나 디즈니 파워 동심파괴 에프터 에버 에프터로 인기를 얻었다. 요약한 영화로는 해리 포터, 반지의 제왕, 스타워즈 등이 있다. 시리즈 이외의 컨텐츠로는 무비 빌런 메들리가 있다.

2. 시리즈 목록

2.1. (영화) in 99 Seconds

2.1.1. 해리 포터


가사
Prologue
There once was a boy named Harry
Destined to be a star
His parents were killed by Voldemort
Who gave him a lightning scar
Harry, you're a wizard

The Sorcerer's Stone:
Harry goes to Hogwarts
He meets Ron and Hermione
McGonagall requires he play for Gryffindor
Draco is a daddy's boy
Quirrell becomes unemployed
The Sorcerer's Stone is destroyed by Dumbledore

The Chamber of Secrets:
Ron break his wand
Now Ginny's gone
And Harry's in mortal danger
Tom Riddle hides his snake inside
His ginormous secret chamber

The Prisoner of Azkaban:
Harry blows up Aunt Marge
The dementors come and take charge
Lopin is a wolf
The rat's man
And now the prisoner is at large
They use time travel so they can
Save the prisoner of Azkaban
Who just so happens to be Harry's Godfather
I don't get it really either

The Goblets of Fire:
Harry gets put in the
Triwizard Tournament
With dragons and mermaids
Oh no!
Edward Cullen gets slayed!
He's back

The Order of the Phoenix:
Harry, Harry, it's getting scary
Voldemort's back
Now you're a revolutionary Harry
Dumbledore, Dumbledore, why is he ignored your
costant attempts to contact him?
He is forced to leave the school
Umbridge arrives
Draco's a tool
Kids break into the Ministry
Serious Black is dead as can be

The Half-Blood Prince:
Split your soul
Seven parts of a whole
They're horcruxes
It's Dumbledore's end

The Deathly Hallows:
There once was a boy named Harry
Who constantly conquered death
But in one final duel between good and bad
He may take his final breath

2.1.2. 반지의 제왕


2.1.3. 스타워즈


원문 해석
Prologue
Long, long time ago, long time ago in a galaxy
Far in a galaxy, far far away

Episode I: The Phantom Menace
There once was a boy slave destined to save space
He wins a big pod race and hits on a queen
Padme's a cougar
Qui gets killed by Darth Maul who is then chopped in half
Obi Wan must train the one from Tatooine

Episode II: Attack of the Clones
It's the clone age, sand people rampage
Mommy got flayed, strayed
Ani's bae is Padme

Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
[Anakin vs. Obi Wan and Yoda versus Sidius and Grievous versus Obi Wan, you're breaking my heart]
Anakin you are breaking my heart
Order is made, Jedi are slain
Kill all the baby tiny younglings
Sid takes the throne, Long live the clones
Burn Ani, turn him to a robo

Episode IV: A New Hope
Leia hides plans, Vader chokes a man
Alderaan's gone and Han shoots first
You're my only hopie Obi Wan
Look, a small moon
That's a space ship
Worshipfullness, walking carpet
This princess better pay out
Use the force, Luke
Close your eyes and shoot

Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
Lando betrays Han and friends in the sky
Skywalker flies, do or don't, there's no try
Try the dark side
No! No, no! No!
Luke, I'm your daddykins
Your mom was kissing Anakin
Han's frozen
I love you
I know

Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
It's father, son and daughter
A dynasty united at last
The galaxy is free from evil
Thanks to the goodness in Darth from the past
Prologue
아주 오랜 옛날
머나먼 은하계에는

에피소드 1: 보이지 않은 위협
장차 우주을 구할 노예 소년이 있었지
그는 포드 레이스에서 승리하고 여왕과 부딪혔지
파드메는 연하남을 좋아해
콰이곤 진은 다스몰에게 반토막나 죽고
오비완은 타투인의 선택받은 자를 가르쳐야 해

에피소드 2: 클론의 습격
클론의 시대야
샌드피플이 날뛰고
엄마는 실종되고,
아나킨의 연인은 파드메라네

에피소드 3: 시스의 복수
아나킨 넌 내 마음을 아프게 해
명령이 내려졌고, 제다이들은 죽어야 한다.
어린 제자들을 학살하라
시스가 왕좌에 올랐고 클론이여 영원하라
아나킨은 로봇이 되었네

에피소드 4: 새로운 희망
레아가 계획을 숨기고 베이더는 목을 조르네
엘더란이 없어졌고 한이 먼저야
오비완 당신은 유일한 희망이에요
봐! 저건 작은 달이야!
저건 우주정거장이야
숭배하라, 걸어다니는 카펫이여
공주는 보수를 잘 쳐줄꺼야
포스를 쓰거라 루크
눈을 감고 쏴

에피소드 5; 재국의 역습
란도는 하늘에서 한과 친구들을 배신하네
스카이워커가 날아간다.
한다 안 한다, 해본다는 없다.
다크 사이드를 써.
안 돼, 아니야
루크, 네가 니 애비다
니 엄마는 아나킨이랑 뽀뽀했대
한은 얼어버렸지
사랑해요
나도 알아

에피소드 6: 제다이의 귀환
아버지와 아들, 딸이야
마침네 운명이 하나로 묶였고
은하계는 악으로부터 해방되었지
과거의 베이더의 선한 면 덕분이었지

2.2. After Ever After[2]

2.2.1. DISNEY Parody 1


원문 해석
If you've ever wondered why
Disney's tales all end in lies
Here's what happened after all their dreams came true

ARIEL ( Under the Sea)
I loved being princess down in
This beautiful ocean blue
But mermaids are going missing
They end up in someone's stew
So just try to put yourself into somebody else's gills
You're killing my ecosystem with fishing and oil spills
Thank you BP, thank you BP
The British are killing, oil is spilling
Now I can't see... MY EYES!
Chinamen feast on Flounder's fins
Plus the Japanese killed all my whale friends
Oceans are browning, I think I'm drowning
Thanks to BP
YOU SUCK!

JASMINE ( Prince Ali)
Hey, I'm OK, but I'm slightly scared
My husband's a mark for the War on Terror
Aladdin was taken by the CIA
We're not Taliban
You've got the wrong man
In Guantanamo Bay
Prince Ali, where could he be, drowning in wawa
Interrogation from the nation of the "free"
Bin Laden's taken the fall
We're not trained pilots at all
Jafar went crazy and no one put up a fuss
We're for freedom, Genie can vouch for us
Bush was crazy, Obama's lazy, al-Qaeda's not in this country
Set free my Prince Ali

BELLE ( Belle)
A whore! A whore!
A whore, a whore, a whore!
This town's gone wild since I married Adam
They think I'm going straight to hell
But the charges laid on me of bestiality
Could wind up getting me thrown in a cell
No, I'm overrun by mad men
I hear they plan to burn me at the stake
They legit believe I'm Satan
And now I hear that PETA's gonna take my beast away

POCAHONTAS ( Colors of the Wind)
After John Smith traveled back to England
I helped my people cultivate the fields
More English, French, and Spaniards came to visit
And they greeted us with guns and germs and steel
They forced us into unknown lands of exile
They pillaged, raped, and left us all for dead
So now I'm far more liberal with a weapon
When I separate their bodies from their heads
Have you ever held the entrails of an English guy?
Or bit the beating hearts of Spanish men?
Can you shoot an arrow in some French guy's eyeball?
Can you paint with the red colors in these men
I can murder if I please
Cause I'm dying of disease
I can paint with the red colors in these men

Thanks to BP
Where's Prince Ali?
Bestiality
I've got STDs
왜 모든 디즈니 이야기들이
거짓말로 끝나는지 궁금하시나요
이건 그들이 꿈을 이룬 뒤 일어난 일들입니다

에리얼 ( Under the Sea)
푸르고 아름다운 바다의 공주여서
좋았을 때가 있었죠
하지만 인어들은 실종되고
누군가의 찌개 속에서나 발견되지요
그러니까 이제 다른 사람의 입장에서 생각해보세요
나의 생태계를 낚시와 기름유출로 파괴하고 있어요
고마워요 BP, 고마워요 BP[3]
영국인들은 죽이고, 기름은 유출되고
난 이제 앞이 안 보여... 내 눈!
중국인들은 플라운더 지느러미를 뜯고 있고
일본인들은 내 고래친구들을 다 죽였어요
바다는 갈색이 되어가고, 난 익사하고
고마워요 BP
YOU SUCK!

자스민 ( Prince Ali)
전 괜찮아요 하지만 조금 두려워요
제 남편이 테러리스트로 지목됐어요
알라딘이 CIA에 잡혀갔어요
우리는 탈레반이 아니에요
사람을 잘못 잡아갔어요
관타나모 만으로요[4]
알리 왕자님 어딨을까 물고문당하면서
"자유"의 나라라는 곳에서 행해지는 심문
빈 라덴은 죽었어요
우리는 훈련받은 비행기 조종사가 아니에요
자파는 미쳤고 아무도 막을 사람이 없네
우리는 자유를 원해요 지니가 보증해줄 수 있어요
부시는 미쳤고 오바마는 게으르고 알 카에다는 이 나라에 없어요
나의 알리 왕자님을 풀어주세요

( Belle)
창녀다! 창녀다!
창녀다, 창녀다, 창녀다!
제가 아담과 결혼하고 나서부터
이 마을이 미쳐돌아가요
그들은 제가 지옥에 떨어질거라 해요
나의 죄목인 수간은
나를 감옥에 집어넣을 수도 있어요
안 돼, 미친 사람들이 날 쫓아오잖아
그들이 나를 화형시킬 거래요
그들은 내가 사탄이라고 생각해요
그리고 이제는 PETA가 나의 야수를 데려가 버린데요

포카혼타스 ( Colors of the Wind)
존 스미스가 영국으로 돌아간뒤
전 제 부족을 도와서 농사를 지었죠
더 많은 영국인, 프랑스인, 스페인인들이 왔죠
그리고 우리를 총과 균과 쇠로 맞이했죠
우리를 미지의 땅으로 쫓아내고
우리를 약탈하고, 강간하고 죽게 내버려두었어요
그래서 전 이제 무기로 자유를 찾았어요
그들의 머리와 몸을 분리할 때요
영국인의 내장을 쥐어본적 있나요?
아님 스페인인의 뛰는 심장을 깨물어본 적은요?
프랑스인의 눈알에 화살을 쏠 수 있나요?
이 사람들의 피로 색칠을 할 수 있나요
저는 원하면 죽일 수 있어요
왜냐하면 병으로 죽어가고 있거든요
나는 이 남자들의 피로 색칠할 수 있어요

고마워 BP
알리 왕자는 어딨지?
수간녀
나는 성병 걸렸어

2.2.2. DISNEY Parody 2


원문
If you've ever wondered why
Disney tales all end in lies
Here's what happened after all their dreams came true

MULAN ( I'll Make a Man Out of You)
After saving China I went home alone
I was feeling conflicts in my lower zone
I've been dressing like a guy for months
Now I'm losing all control
I think I am a guy in my soul
I wanna be a man
Soldier 1: I've never seen a guy so hot
Mulan: Time to reinvent the new me
Soldier 2: Every time he speaks it makes me want to sing (I'm so confused)
Soldier 1: Be quiet, or we'll get caught
Soldier 3: Maybe one day he'll screw me
Mulan: Now I really get why my nickname is Ping
I've gotta be a man
I've got the brains and the bite of females
Plus the brute and the brawn of dudes
I know I'm ready for transformation
It's time to replace all these useless tubes
(Good for you)

CINDERELLA ( A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes)
The prince was absolutely the only single wish my heart made
Guess my wish came true
But we never really talked much
Before he discovered my shoe
The night after we got married
I recounted all of my plights
Of how I fit inside a pumpkin
My canines turned to coachmen
Prince threw me in Bedlam that night
The white jackets say I'm nutty (she's nutty as a bat)
Cause my clothes are sewn by rats (put some meds in her food)
But their pills turn my brain to putty
Now Lucifer's not just my cat (I AM SATAN)
Their insulin puts me under
Shock therapy's made me insane
And after years of steady frying
The doctors gave up trying
They stuck 2 steel rods in my brain

TIANA ( Dig a Little Deeper)
I spent a bloomin lifetime
To open my cafe
Then I took a dive in 2005
Now it's washed away (it's all washed away)
I was picked up by a chopper
After four nights on my roof
Now my new home is the Astrodome
Cause New Orleans ain't Katrina proof
Ya better carry 'round a shotgun
Or looters take your kids
Ya better pee inside of jam jars
Be sure to keep those lids (ew)
We needed Noah but we got Bush
Our "savior" flew away and hid
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees, I'm dead

ELSA ( Let It Go)
There is no snow on the mountain tonight
Just sulfur in the air
A kingdom of greenhouse gases
Only Bill Nye seems to care
My town is melting, breaking off into the sea
It's time I show the strength of an evil queen
With Germany and Putin, too
I'll free the penguins and throw you in a zoo
We're going green by spilling red
And if you're not dead
I built a hoard of evil snowmen
We're gonna take over the world
Let it snow, let it snow
Now Fox News will need heat lamps (Mother Russia!)
Let it snow, let it snow
I hope you concentrate in camp (Heil Elsa)
We don't care who we have to slay
Let my troops march on
The cold's coming back and it's here to stay

Tiana: I sunk like a brick
Cinderella: Prince thinks I'm sick
Elsa: Ice is melting quick
Mulan: Now I have a lot of self esteem

2.2.3. DISNEY Parody 3


원문
If you've ever wondered why
Disney tales all end in lies
Here's what happened after all their dreams came true

SIMBA ( I Just Can't Wait to Be King)
Was gonna be a mighty king, Mufasa's famous heir
Well, your little mane's been lion-tamed
By beasts who don't fight fair
I've turned into the main event for soldiers big and small
And now, I dread my severed-head might end up on your wall (Meow)
Let me help this African economy
Oh, my species is going extinct!
Everywhere you look, death!
Taking shots at my pride
Thanks for that petition to stop a straight-up genocide!
(Scope, set)
Rafiki's brains are not a cure for AIDS
Now, ebonies need ivory for pay
I don't think Hamlet ended up this way
Oh, my species is going extinct!
Oh, my species is go-

PETER PAN ( You Can Fly! You Can Fly! You Can Fly! / Following the Leader)
Every time I fly to town
I grow up when I come down
Now, I've been stuck at age sixteen
For eighty years of puberty
In unforgiving tights!
He's upright, he's upright, he's upright
We're following his leader, his leader, his leader
We're following his leader
Wherever he may bone
Tee-dum, tee-dee
My teedle-dee's out to play
It's one for all
The mermaids are wet for days
This engine's revved
There's only one booty for me
Just a teedle-ee-rump
A teedle-ee-hump-tee day
Think of the fappiest thoughts
I'm a happy little thot (Okay)
Wendy is my special gal
She's like ninety
I'm down
The dentures never bite
He's upright, he's upright, he's upright
Hope he's bi
He's upright

HERCULES ( Zero to Hero)
Save my soul
Herc' was on a roll
Every god and goddess here is begging to atone
Replaced by intelligent design
New guy's rolling by and turning water into wine
The Romans are chanting, "Christo! Christo!"
He's a god-send bigger than Nero
Out with the old, in with the Jew
Hero to Christo, God's honest truth
Hero to Christo!
Hey Herc', you're screwed
The Jesus freak is super weak
I'm so divine!
You see, I came inside a virgin's bod'
So have I
I threw him in the Colosseum
A lion à la carte
Three days went by, he zombified
And rose up in search of hearts!

ALADDIN ( A Whole New World)
I'm a prisoner of war
ISIS blew up my city
They're throwing me off a building
'Cause they think that I like guys
A holy war
An old fantastical point of view
Carpet was burned alive, streamed nationwide
I can't go back to where I used to thieve
Every turn; suicide
A hundred-thousand children plead
The toppling of Agrabah with Sharia Law
Stop this holy war before we're through (A holy war)
Unholy war (That's where we'll be)
Just refugees (Send helping hands)
Instead of bans for you and me

The lions are gone
Hair on my junk
Jesus is a hunk
Screw Trump!

3. 여담


[1] University of Texas at Austin [2] 영상 제목이 DISNEY After Ever After 가 아닌 것으로 보아 굳이 디즈니 시리즈에 한정하지 않으려는 것으로 보인다.그러나 아직까지 디즈니밖에 올리지 않았다! [3] 멕시코 만 석유 유출사태를 일으킨 회사이다. 해당 사고의 심각성은 항목 참조. [4] 여기가 뭐하는 곳인지는 관타나모 만 문서 참조.